walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
