I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
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