Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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Sorry poseidenswrath hasn't picked any favorites yet.

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(619): View more from California

I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity

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(302): View more from Delaware

I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.

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(206): View more from Washington

Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.

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(517): View more from Michigan

just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.

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(334): View more from Alabama

Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.

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(314): View more from Missouri

You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night

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(513): View more from Ohio

Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?

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(801): View more from Utah

Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?

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(406): View more from Montana

Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.

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