weddingsv make me drug and hornr
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize