You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
