the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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