That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
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