ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
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