U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
Randomize
