Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
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