That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
