ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Randomize
