This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
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