Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Randomize
