Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
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