we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
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