Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
Randomize
