Plan B is the new Plan A
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
i need some magic done to my vagina
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Randomize
