Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
no more duck duck goose at the bar
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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