Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
