I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
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