oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
I think my fart just growled at me.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
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