Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
