Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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