i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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