Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
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