it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Randomize
