he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
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