Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Randomize
