David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
He shit in the fireplace
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
