Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Randomize
