i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
