we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Need sex. Gaining weight.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
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