Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
Randomize
