Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
I'm going to jail i love you
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Randomize
