honey bunches of taint.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
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