my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Randomize