finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Randomize
