Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
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