gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Randomize
