Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
