Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
Randomize
