I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Randomize
