People in love make me want to vomit
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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