Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
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