maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
no. you can't hotbox the world.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
