Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
When did we convert life to cartoon?
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
