chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
Randomize
