you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize
