do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
Randomize
